Trouble Wears a Blue Plaid Shirt
an excerpt

“Hey, Elizabeth – what does the D stand for?” Larry asked as Elizabeth emerged from the bathroom after doing her hair.

“D? What D?” she asked, puzzled.

“Your middle initial,” Larry said, pointing to her Associate of Science degree on the wall. “It says ‘Elizabeth D. Watts.”

“It’s a mystery,” Elizabeth said, trying to sound aloof but failing miserably.

“Oh, come on. You know mine. What is it?”

Elizabeth’s shoulders sagged. Softly, she said, “Disco.”

Larry and Steve exchanged mischievous glances. “What was that?” Larry asked.

“Disco,” Elizabeth said sharply. “My full name is Elizabeth Disco Watts.”

“How did your parents come up with that?” Steve asked from in front of her computer.

“They found it in some book of baby names, in the chapter of unusual names. I guess there was a lady in medieval England or something named Elizabeth Disco, and they thought it was a great name.” Elizabeth crossed her arms. “All right, what’s your middle name, Steve Collins?”

“Actually, Steven is his middle name,” Larry said before Steve could say anything.

“What?” Elizabeth asked, confused.

“He doesn’t like his first name, so he goes by his middle name.” Elizabeth gave him a skeptical look. “It isn’t that strange. I have an uncle whose first name is Troy, but he goes by David, his middle name, instead.”

“So what is it, Steve?” she asked. Steve glowered and remained silent.

“Come on, tell her. If you don’t I will,” Larry said, his eyes twinkling.

“Fine…My first name is actually Phillip,” he said in a voice so flat it could have been mistaken for the state of Kansas.

“Phillip?” Elizabeth repeated. “That’s not so ba – oh.” She started to giggle. “That’s too funny.”

“It’s not that funny,” Steve said in a low voice.

“No, it’s pretty funny,” Larry opined, drawing a hard glare from his best friend.

“So were you named after him? Were your parents big soft rock fans?” Elizabeth asked, with a disturbing amount of glee.

“No, I was not named after Phil Collins,” Steve said in a mocking tone. “I was named Phillip after my maternal grandfather.”

Elizabeth took a deep breath and sat on the couch. “You don’t play drums, do you?” she asked. With a snort, she started laughing.