Excerpt: Seven One-Night Stands with Warren Moon

“Professor sex,” said Lavinia with a smile. “The material that you were studying does not turn you on. I think in professor sex, the material does not necessarily turn you on – the Sassanians sure as hell don’t turn me on – but the act of studying, the physical act of doing intellectual activity in a field that you love can be come so exhilarating that that exhilaration can easily be funneled into sexual arousal when you’re with someone who is experiencing the same sort of intellectual stimulation.”
“Go on,” said Heidi with a smile. She was beginning to see where this was going.
“So for instance, if I’m here writing my paper and I get one of my bursts of inspiration, you know, like I think of some really profound interpretation for this quote here” – she arbitrarily picked up one of the note cards – “and can tie it into my thesis in a way that’s both clear and nuanced, and as I’m writing, someone who’s at the table with me –”
“Warren Moon.”
“Warren Moon – is working on his book, and he stumbles upon a particularly stimulating passage in the history of Sallust he’s working on, and begins furiously underlining the text and typing into his word processor, and then, when we’ve both gotten our ideas out, we look up and meet each other’s eyes.”
“And then you have sex!”
“Not so fast!” Lavinia held up her hand. She was no longer making eye contact with Heidi. Her eyes were staring off somewhere above Heidi’s shoulder and Heidi could tell that the vision in her mind was that Latin professor looking up from his computer and seductively meeting her eyes. “Then we stand up. We grab each other’s hands. We get up on the table and begin embracing. Then our glasses come off. And then everything else comes off...”