Excerpt: Her Waking Heart

Dear Diary,

Evelyn

Evelyn Rosenberg sat on the floral print living room window seat, gripping her knees to her chest, tears flowing down her moisture stained cheeks freer than they ever have. Never before in her life had she felt like a failure, but at this moment in time, it was all the only thing she felt.

“How could you lose my baby, Evie?” Mack screamed at his wife. “Are you so worthless that you can’t even keep my baby alive? You’re a woman, this is your job, and you can’t even do it right!” he continued to vent his anger, pacing back and forth across the shag green carpet just feet away from Evelyn. “What are you good for if you can’t even do this right?”

“The… the doctor said it wasn’t anything I did, Mack, it wasn’t my fault,” she whimpered through her tears.

“Then whose fault is it? You were the one that was supposed to keep my baby safe; you were the one who was supposed to make sure nothing happened to him! Don’t you go blaming the fact that you’re a pathetic excuse of a woman on anything or anyone but yourself, Evie!"

“Mack, I’m-I’m so sorry,” she choked between sobs.

“Sorry doesn’t bring him back, does it?” he demanded. “Does it!?” he repeated. “Look at me, Evie!” he ordered, getting in her face.

She slowly moved her head up, her eyes connecting with him for the first time since they had gotten home from the hospital hours earlier. The anger in his eyes was unsettling. “No,” she whispered, with a fresh pool of liquid escaping from her eyes, “it doesn’t.”

“I can’t even be in the same house as you right now, Evie, my blood is boiling right now!” he screamed. “I’m going out,” he announced, grabbing his coat from the wooden coat rack and stormed out the front door; the engine of his 1949 baby blue Pontiac Sedan coming to life moments later before racing down the street.