Gwen was brought into this Earth by a band of beat-nicks jamming on their bongos in a coffee shop in Greenwich Village. She immediately began to feel the groove of the scene saying to the crowd, "Yea 'o daddy-o, I feel what cha mean by ol' man blue! Hey man, don't bring me down like that 'cause I gotta dance to the bang of the bongo!" All the beats in the crowd began snapping their fingers in applause.
During the hippy movement, Gwen became an artist, using her own hair as a brush to paint with. She then hooked up with Pappa Paul's Happy Hippy House and Hootenanny Revue where she played the washboard. Teaching herself to play guitar, she set out on her own as a musician poet. People still talk about the time she turned her enemies’ bowels to water while reciting her poetry.
In the progressive rock era Gwen married River Waters, lead singer and rhythm guitar player of the band Sheet Music. The couple broke up after just two years with Gwen filing for divorce claiming that the marriage had more sheet in it than music.
After the divorce Gwen lived in a tee pee she set up in the Shawnee National Forest. There she learned to commune with the sky and the trees and all the little furry animals scurrying about on the ground. This behavior attracted an alien worshiping sun cult led by the charismatic Eduardo Cottonhoney. Eight and a half years later she woke up while milking a cow in rural Washington State. All that Gwen could remember is once having hair and that the cows' name is Lucy Lynn.
Despite the memory loss Gwen moved on to Seattle, the nearest big city, where she found employment working as a barmaid at Bondage Barbie’s Bunny Bar and Early Morning Pancake Stand. While working next to Barbie, a leather clad, whip welding, dominatrix who wears bunny ears, she came to the conclusion that all her life has been like one big lie. Thus, Gwen decided to move to the Olympic Peninsula where she works by night as a CNA and by day as a novelist.
- I live in seagull calling country. Seriously, that's what people do around here.
- Seeing how many cans of cat food my roommates cat will eat before he explodes.
- Favorite noveling music:
- The totally bitchin' sound of my parakeet yelling at me!
- Favorite books or authors:
- Pratchett, Gaiman, Dick, Hesse, Huxely